Therapy for Couples

A number of therapists listed at Toronto Psychotherapy Group are trained to provide couples therapy and counselling. Because good relationships are at the core of a satisfying life, conflict or distance between you and someone close to you can be a source of distress.

All kinds of couples can benefit from therapy. This includes straight couples, queer couples, new and long-term partners, monogamous and polyamorous folks—because many relationships, at some point, need outside help to thrive.

What Is Couples Therapy?

Couples therapy offers a safe place for partners to work through their challenges. It can help partners overcome unproductive or negative patterns of communication, hurtful arguing, and emotional or sexual distance—and unpack how those difficulties arose.

Trained couples therapists understand the need for safety. This means that the therapist collaborates equally with both partners. Couples therapists focus on building mutual understanding and strengthening the emotional connection between partners.

What Are the Signs that a Couple Should Seek Therapy?

Many situations move couples to seek therapy together. Beyond conflict or lack of intimacy, some couples seek therapy because they find themselves changing as individuals, and feel out of sync with one another. Some seek couples work to deepen their connection rather than to resolve a crisis.

Signs that couples therapy is a good idea for you and your partner include:

• Persistent arguing
• A lacking sense of love, connection, or trust
• Blocked communication or understanding
• Infidelity or betrayal
• Mismatched visions of the relationship or of the future

What Happens in Couples Therapy?

Typically, relationship and couples therapy includes the following:

• Each client has a safe place to speak and be heard by the other
• Partners identify harmful patterns and their roots in the relationship
• Partners are helped to work with strong emotions when in conflict
• Each person develops strategies to de-escalate arguments
• Partners create new intimacy and connection together

What Varieties of Couples Therapy Are Available?

Many couples therapists are trained in a variety of approaches to couples work, including those rooted in psychodynamic [link to TPG Approach: Psychodynamic] perspectives.

For example, some are trained in the Psychobiological Approach to Couples Therapy® (PACT). PACT integrates research in neuroscience and attachment, alongside understanding the science of emotional activation, to deal with difficulties in relating. Some are trained in Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) for couples, which focuses on a couple’s emotional bond. The EFT therapist seeks to find and understand the negative repeating patterns that have developed between the  couple.

All styles of couples therapy improve your communication skills, and foster new, healthier patterns of relating to your partner.

Read more about the idea of attachment in relationships.